tasty bytes from China

June 2013
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Fifty Shades of Pee
Filed under: General, Culture
Posted by: @ 9:46 am


OK. I admit. I have been caught purchasing club size boxes of
Depends at Costco. Not for me but my aging mother. 

If you’re part of the 29% of Americans who are now in the
care-giver role, you probably have, too.

And soon, there’s something more for you to read than
incontinence websites.



This is my first stab at a novel, dealing with the mixed
emotions that come with caring for an aging parent.

While I spend the school year in China, I spend the summers near
Charlevoix, Michigan, as my mother’s caregiver. It’s a 24/7 job, helping her to
the john, replacing pea-size hearing aid batteries, giving her medicine and
feeding her a steady stream of molasses cookies. Though there’s a part of me
that wishes I was sipping umbrella drinks in Phuket instead of dealing with
pill boxes and Depends, there’s a bigger part that dreads the day I no longer
fill them or smell them.

I’m sure your family isn’t that different than mine . You deal
with tough decisions regarding where your parent should spend their golden
years. Are you a bad child for crying uncle and making plans for your mother to
live in an assisted center? If you can only afford half of her medication, do
you go for the pain meds or the heart pills? Do you let your dad call your
mother every night and talk for twenty minutes, even though she’s been dead for

There aren’t any easy answers.

Or take this morning. I wanted to give my mother a bath. She
went down in the bathroom, her soapy body as slippery as a greased pig. And
since she has the muscle tone of a bag of marshmallows, my mom wasn’t much
help, causing me to slip as well. I was terrified and thankful that she didn’t
crack her head open on the tile floor or toilet—or me, either.

It took 45 minutes of strategic planning to figure out how to
get her up, not wanting to call the fire department.

So I ask myself, what do I want to be the last memory of my
mom: seeing her having a fatal fall in front of me or watching her make crafts
out of raisins at an old folks home?

Anyway HIP can help you smile and realize you are not alone.
This upbeat story, told by a streetwise caregiver, can help you laugh at the
things that could drive you crazy as well as bring you to Bangkok and back for
whirlwind adventure.

You can get a peeview of HIP at smashwords soon!


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