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One of the most interesting things about teaching in China is hot lunch. It brings mystery meat burgers to a whole new level. A chili dog could literally be a chili dog. Johny Marzetti casserole is replaced with Chung-He Choi’s Surprise. SWR sandwiches (seaweed and rice) take the place of the classic PBJ.
Actually, the school lunch food is quite tasty.
The school cafeteria does not have an industrial kitchen: just a few sinks, a glorified Easy Bake Oven plus lots of tables and stools suited for miniature spines.
So each day, lunch ladies pull up in a van next to the school’s cafeteria to unload a plethora of rib stickin’ food. The food is hot, teen-tested and tasty.
The best part is, it won’t send you to the squatty potty.
It’s clean cuisine.
There are two lunch lines: the first being the western line, catering to those addicted processed tastes such as twinkies, big macs and anything wrapped in cellophane. This line sells Trans Fats Du Jour specialties such as: mac ‘n cheese, pizza twists, chicken fingers and glazed donuts the size of a first grader. You can also get coke, fanta, juice and other sucrose elixirs that will make for an ADD afternoon.
Then, there is the Korean line, catered by the “Korean Ladies.”
I don’t know their names but I do know this is the line to be in. These women are living breathing Betty Crockers, who’ve replaced the trademark red spoon with wooden chopsticks.
They know how to wok.
For the price of a bowl of tater tots, you can get fresh sushi, pot stickers, dumplings, sizzling satay or a Korean corn dog.
There’s spicy homemade kimchi (fermented cabbage otherwise known as Korean Sauerkraut) and bowls of bibimbop –my new fav– a mixture of rice, crunchy veggies topped with a fried egg.
The Korean meals are served on traditional Korean dinnerware (not Styrofoam containers).
Instead of a plastic spork, you are given real chopsticks.
There is also Gimbap sandwiches (triangular rice sandwiches wrapped in seaweed, otherwise known as SWR). They are amazing but create farts that could wake Chairman Mao.
Another daily special, is bibimgukso. This Koean cousin to mastacolli is swimming in a sweet red sauce. Your eyes think it’s Spaghettios but it’s switch and bait when it comes to taste. The noodles are not pasta but chewy and bland.
As for the sauce? It’s definitely not Franco-American.
Most days, I pack my own lunch. It’s the same cold lunch I’ve had since the days it was packed in my Herman Monster lunchbox. A Skippy peanutbutter sandwich (the real deal, not the bootleg) and a cruncy apple, instead of a red plaid thermos filled with Campbell’s Tomato Soup.
It’s still Mmmm Mmmm good.