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11/06/11
Faith, feet, and fries.
Filed under: General
Posted by: @ 6:57 pm

FrenchFries

Before we moved to China, I had a lot of false beliefs about
this country. First, I thought if I dug a hole through my backyard in Michigan,
I’d end up in Tiananmen  Square. Wrong, I’d
end up in the Indian Ocean.   The second is fortune cookies. They aren’t the crunchy creation of a Chinese Betty
Crocker, but are an American marketing ploy based on a Japanese cracker recipe.
The third is church.


Yes, there are churches in China.  


Before I came to China, I heard there weren’t any churches
here. Untrue. In a city of 6 million Chinese, there is not one but two churches
in Kunming. We’ve checked out the Chinese Trinity Church of Kunming, on Renrim
Road. http://www.gospeltimes.cn/news/2008_04_22/2252


It’ a pretty ordinary church that looks like it belongs in Peoria,
Illinois, not Kunming, China. Other than that, it’s the same. Well, almost.


Since we do not speak Chinese, we get headphones where
everything is interpreted into English. Unfortunately, the headphones do not block out the live Chinese broadcast, so you get to hear the sermon in stereo.


And yes,  there is
some creative editing of the Bible. The creation story is missing and so is
Easter, which explains  why China lacks
an assortment of jelly beans and marshmallow bunnies in the spring.  But for the most part, church is the same. If
the minister speaks longer than thirty minutes, the congregation gets fidgety, hoping
that the sermon is over before their Sunday roast—or Peking chicken—is done.


After church, we head to a little French fry place next to
the old Wal-Mart (pronounced war-mar). Fallacy number two deals with French
fries. China might be known for its stir-fry, by it has the best French fries on
the planet, hands down. Fresh harvested potatoes are chopped into hunky chunks then
fried in peanut oil and rolled in spicy “lao jao”.
You stab the  sizzling hot nuggets with toothpicks. Not only are
they spicy hot, they can blister the top of your mouth. You get a hefty cup of
these tater gems for about thirty five cents.  You tell
yourself you will only eat a few, then force yourself to stop
at half a cup. But before you know it, you’ve polished off the whole thing
wondering why you need to loosen your belt a notch.

P5270038


While the potatoes swell in our tummies, we make way to the foot massage place to debunk a third fallacuy: a way to a man’s heart
is not through the stomach. The truth is, it’s through his feet. The Chinese believe that
those five little piggies are your body’s second heart and I think they’re on to
something.  Along with massaging your
feet, the masseuse will work a few kinks out of your back. The foot massage
places have TV, too, so you can watch Chinese soap operas and infomercials for
prostrate shrinking herbs. Foot jobs costs about $2. Just don’t turn around and
look at the art work. The toes are scary.


PA020029

Faith, feet and fries.  When in China, ya gotta this trinity of actitivities.  And that’s the truth!

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